Blogwitched

This morning I headed into the kitchen to make some breakfast...

and I found Uncle Arthur trying to contact me through the oven.

(Oh, did I forget to mention that in my real life, I am Samantha Stevens?)

(Yes, the Samantha Stevens who lives on Morning Glory Circle. I have this creepy painting in my house...)

Oh, and there's a really cool statue of me at the local park...

Uncle Arthur wanted to warn me of a virus that was going around...(no, not the fat virus...we've already been exposed to that, silly....) Just as he was about to tell me what it was, I heard Cousin Serena pop into the living room...ugh!

It seems that Cousin Serena thought it would be hilarious to bring Catherine's Tabitha's toys to life. She's so annoying! Just as I was ready to give her "what for", there was a commotion coming from the hall closet....

It seems Aunt Clara was coming to warn me of Serena's antics, but arrived a few moments too late. All I needed now was for my mother to show up....

which she did a few moments later. Now I had a packed house of magical relatives and frightening looking live stuffed animals. (Esmeralda didn't show up...whew!) I tried to steer everyone into the living room to get a handle on the situation.

In the midst of the commotion, Uncle Arthur handed me an envelope with these photos tucked inside....

What the? How did these two find out about each other?! Now I had some explaining to do to the Double Darrens. And Santa asked me to help out a few times...so what? Who was behind this dirty deed? It could only be one person...Gladys!

I'd have to wiggle my nose and point at her later...grrr....

I finally got everyone settled in. "Uncle Arthur, what's with this virus?" He said it was called the "Twilight Virus". He began telling me that the early symptoms were spending too much time on the phone talking about Twilight and vampires...(I don't do that so I wasn't worried...)




(Gladys....grrrr...stop taking pictures of me!)

He said another symptom was dressing yourself in fabulous clothes or posing in sultry poses in hopes of capturing Edward Cullen's attention because this virus makes you believe he's real. I don't do that either...still not worried...






(I don't know where these came from....)

He went on to say that strange spots develop on your face...

He urged me to call Dr. Bombay before the final symptom emerged...the one that was too terrible to mention....So I called Dr. Bombay...

"Calling Dr. Bombay! Calling Dr. Bombay! Emergency! Come Right Away!"

And poof! There he was! Right from the Opera!

"Ah...it appears that you have touched a black Peruvian rose, Samantha," he said in his booming voice. I smiled shyly. "Oh yes, Edward Cullen gave it to me." I giggled. "I've told those crafty vampires to stop giving those to people!" Dr. Bombay booms. "Take Two Aspirin and Half a Pint of Porpoise Milk. That should do the trick!" and Poof! He was gone!

"Oh no!" peeped Aunt Clara. "Arthur, I do believe she does have the Twilight virus! She thinks Edward gave her a black rose!" "But he did give me a black rose, you old bat!" I snarl.

Uncle Arthur gently takes me by the arm and leads me to the couch. "Sit down, Samantha. The most dangerous symptom of all is the uncontrollable urge to bite people in your delirium believing you have been bitten by Edward. Let's get you some aspirin and porpoise milk and you'll feel better right away!"

Just then, Darren (#1) arrived home from work early..."Hello, Darling!"

Oh my stars! It's true! I have the Twilight Virus! Time for the two snap exit!

(and that is just how my day began! We're not even halfway through yet!)