Monday, May 4, 2009

Not Me Monday! The Rebel Edition

Join in the Not Me! Monday fun brought to the land of Blog from MckMama over at My Charming Kids!

And we're off!

*I did NOT squeal with delight and do a happy dance when my nephew (who is by the way, the world's best nephew) called to tell me he was accepted for the Canandaigua Braves Traveling All Star Baseball Team! I did NOT get all warm fuzzy! Way to go, Alec! (I did NOT get seriously peeved at his mother (my sister) for not having her camera to photograph his homerun that won the game on Saturday either....uh yeah...I'm talking to you, Aunt Oooo...what are ya gonna do about it? Spit on me from NY? Take your camera next time!)

(Hear the crickets chirping??? This is the spot where I would NOT have a photo of Alec hitting that awesome home run....just sayin, Oooo...Oh...and Nana and Papa...Boo Hiss on you for not taking your camera to New York!!! Am I the only person in this family who takes a picture of anyone???)

*While running errands yesterday, I did NOT say to my kids "I'm totally addicted to McDonald's Iced Coffee." Six year old Catherine did NOT reply, "I'm totally addicted to boys." (WHAT?!) She did NOT further reply, "One smiled at me at the bookstore...He's so handsome!" I do NOT have a 16 year old girl hiding inside my 6 year old daughter....

*I do NOT want to see the movie "Wolverine" only because I heard Hugh Jackman say he's nearly nude for half of the movie. I would NOT drool all over my popcorn and milk duds because of Hugh's super buff hot body through the whole movie. (uh yeah, Chilly...you ARE taking me to see this movie, broken leg, my drool and all...)

*I did NOT unleash my wrath on a Sam's Club supervisor when a MALE employee entered a filled to capacity LADIES room and began mopping while every stall had a lady or her child using said ladies room facilities. I did NOT completely FREAK OUT upon leaving the ladies room to see that there was no sign posted to warn incoming ladies that mopping by creepy male had commenced. I did NOT want to jack-slap the idiot supervisor who asked me why I didn't yell at the guy to leave. HELLO!!! HE SHOULDN'T BE THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE, IDIOT! Oh, and by the way...I DO NOT work at Sam's Club...not my job to keep the creeps out of the bathroom!

*While at Sam's Club, I did NOT hear choirs of Angels singing and see the lights from Heaven shining down upon this...


(Just a hint, Chilly...and NOT a subtle one...tell the Viking that you have to bestow this lovely gift upon me for Mother's Day....tell him to add a little something, something in your check so you can purchase this little lovie for me...it's only $700....Wait! Do I hear the paramedics coming? Did you just have another heart attack???)

I have NOT been busier than a one legged man in an a$$ kicking contest all week. (hold on...I'm still laughing over picturing Chilly trying to kick my a$$ with his one good leg....snorty snort snort...) I have NOT secretly wanted to play nasty tricks on Chilly with his crutches (like putting them just out of reach, decorating them with girly stuff, etc...I know, completely juvenile, but hilarious..) I am NOT going to be playing catch up all this week!

I will NOT be dealing with my brokea$$ness (thanks, Bobby G!) for the entire month of May because everyone in the family had to choose May as their birth month. I will NOT be furthering my brokea$$ness due to Irish dance competition fees and necessities for the little Irish Dancer Girl because she's in her first official competition this month. I am NOT considering a career as a stripper to make some quick cash.

I do NOT wish you all a very Happy Monday and do NOT hope you have a fabulous week ahead of you!

xoxo

p.s. Go get your funny with Bobby G at The G Spot for more fabulous words from his Bobby G Deep Dictionary!

41 comments:

Cammie said...

Happy Monday!!!

Me said...

As Always..you make me laugh!

Happy Monday to you!

{hugs}

Jillene said...

I do NOT want to see Wolverine either. But I, however, will NOT be drooling all over my popcorn and Jr. Mints!!

Natalie said...

haha...well Hugh is pretty dang hot!

Kristina P. said...

My birthday is in May, as is my brother's, Adam's step mom, and 2 of my best friends. I basically use my birthday money to buy everyone else present.

Cadance said...

My birthday is in May too!!!! =)

You cracked me up on your daughters comment, and the Sams Club story...that is crazy...and creepy about that mop guy!

Beverly said...

I will NOT add to your craziness by telling you my birthday is this month, too. Just in case you wanna rig a giveaway or anything....

Randi Troxell said...

totally addicted to boys... oooh i love it... heading for trouble you are, lol!!!!

Mama Dawg said...

I'll go with you to see Hugh, I mean, Wolverine. I'm soooooooooo there.

Vickie said...

My mom and sister and nephew both have a birthday in May...Yikes!

I have to tell ya, that yesterday on the way home form where ever I saw a bumper sticker that had What Would Jane Do? With the silhouette and all! I thought about your post and wished my phone was charged up to take a picture!

Polka Dot Moon said...

I do NOT love that McDonald's Iced Coffee either........slurp...slurp...

(giveaways......lots of 'em! come over!)

Kathy B! said...

Happy Monday! I can always count on coming over here and getting a good laugh.

And what the heck is up with the creep in Sam's Club?!? Wacko.

Bobby G said...

WOW! Look at all the love today! im gonna call you Bee G cause you represent fully! You are Dope-on-a-rope! For real! Also as far as comedy goes, check out the casey kasem post from april of 08!

Bobby G said...

Also PS I had a rebel XSI but due to my own personal Brokeassness, I had to sell it cheap...$575. i fonly I had known!

Tracy said...

I heart you... it's true.

The Blonde Duck said...

The Sam's thing would have bothered me. GROSS!

SO said...

I do not want a new camera for mothers day either. And I'm pretty sure that my hubby really will not be getting me one *sigh*

Lana@The Kids Did WHAT?! said...

Wow. I don't know who I'd be more ticked at - the guy who came in mopping or the "supervisor"! Good for you for opening a can of whoop-ass!!

Jazzy Jemz said...

I do NOT want to see Wolverine half nekkid- no, not at all.

Congrats to your nephew for NOT making the all star team.

And wow, your NOT 16 year old daughter inside a 6 year... wow.

Seeker said...

thanks for the visit and being so kind to wait. will get with it soon i hope...just not up to it at the moment

You have had a busy week...i would have wasted the guy in the can and whoop-assed the supervisor.

Alexis AKA MOM said...

Happy Monday girlie! You crack me up love it! And that camera is to die for!

As for your manager dude must be on the same planet as the nob i just talked to at blockbuster. Who I had to inform if I wanted to got into the store with 3 kids I wouldn't be paying to have DVD's mailed to me! I also had to tell him several times you are not helpful stop trying to get me off the phone when I ask you a question answer it not ok it was nice talking to you! What answer my question. Ok mama you always know you can go into the store ... hello did I just fall into a black hole?

Phew ok feel better ... LOL sorry for the long comment ... Muah

Just A Mom (Call me JAM for short) said...

Yes, you better keep a close eye on the sixteen year old ~~ I mean six year old! Boy are you going to have your hands full in a few more years! Too funny!

Hit 40 said...

I had lots of thoughts... but the last won really hit me! I have been trying to put an end to my credit card debt. I have had enough of their games!!!

Then... the oven died!!! I tell myself to be thankful I have plenty of credit! BUT I WANT TO PAY IT OFF!

I am proud that I keep a list of my debt each month to see that it goes down. I think it will go up just a little this month :-( No treats for me!!

Heather said...

Glad I found your blog, yo have put a smile on my otherwise pouty face today! And what is up with people not doing their job, or passing te buck? If I was the manager I would have gone ape shit if my male employee went to mop in a ladies occupied bathroom! He should get written or something.

Michelle-y said...

You crack me up. Period.

P.S. I heart McD's iced coffee (vanilla please). There's one 1/2 mile away and I do NOT drive there on a daily basis.

kari and kijsa said...

Too funny! Thanks for the smiles!!
blessings,
kari & kijsa

pam said...

Why is it that kids seem to grow up so fast? Do you remember saying that when you were six?

Hope your Monday was great!

Jen said...

Aw creepy bathroom guy.

StampinMom said...

Girl, you always crack me up...poor Chilly with his blinged out crutches...oh, wait did I just give you a good idea. I think Chilly likes bling...right? Tee hee...

Jamie :-)

Ryan Ashley Scott said...

Congrats to your nephew! How exciting.

Your daughter's comment about the boys made me smile, because it's so innocent right now. You'll be able to embarrass her with it later.

When my husband had hernia surgery, he couldn't reach his feet so I had to put on his socks and shoes to go out. You can guess what kind of awful socks I put on him. Bahahaha!

Nice camera - I'll take one while you're handing them out. ;)

...The Obnoxious SAHM.... said...

very cool on nephew.

love the innocence.

nice camera! :) I suck at my camera skills. LOL

LadyStyx said...

That's a sweet lookin camera. It's one I had considered for myself. The price-tag, is definitely enough to give one heart-failure and since there were other things much more important to throw money at (namely my allergy shots), I couldnt justify getting it.

LORI said...

UGH. ICKY MAN IN THE BATHROOM WITH THE GIRLIES? THAT'S ALMOST TOO MUCH TO BEAR. I MUST GO WASH. HAVE A LOVELY TUESDAY, AND SIP AN ICED COFFEE FOR ME!

Becky said...

LOL! You are so crizzazzy!!!! I hope you DO get that camera...I just go get it if I were you...ha..ha..better to ask for forgiveness later right? Everyone in our family has May bdays too...man it's a tight month! Happy mother's day :)

Sassypants Wifey said...

DUDE, I so was NOT also at Sams today drooling over the cameras.
As well as I am NOT super happy that strippin life isn't appealing to anyone else... (Should you decide you would like to forego the middle management and open your own place, hit me up, cause momma does NOT need a new pair of shoes (and clothes and probably new unders at that...)
Yeah, yeah, I would never do any of that though...

Sassypants Wifey said...

There is a little blingy award for ya at my place...

Noah's Mommy said...

oh lordy...another NOT so fabulous Not Me Monday Post from you.....Oh god...the one legged a## kicking...and yelling at the supervisor...and maybe your little 16 year old in training would like to go see Wolverine with you...lol.....Have a Great Week

Debbie said...

I was unaware of the Hugh nakedness. Suddenly, I am a Wolverine fan!

Mother Mayhem said...

Mop guy? Shudder.

Marie Reed said...

Your Monday posts are not the total bomb. I did not pee in my pants because I was laughing so hard:)

Unpredictable Journey said...

this made me laugh.
Thanks for the giggle.

:)

have a good one

Amanda

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