Friday Fragments brought to you by Half Past Kissin' Time!
I told Chilly last night that it was time for me to get my hair done. He just stared at me. I say it once more with feeling. More staring. Then I understand what is going through his pea-size brain. He is trying to figure out how he can get a new mistress, Flat Screen TV 2 to move in here! (in case you missed it, a power surge took out our flat screen, laptop and XB360 on Tuesday.)
After more staring, he finally says “We ask that you bear with us during this difficult transition.” WHAT? He's using his "skip tracer/ banker" talk on me! Then I realize he’s making a desperate attempt to plea for his new mistress, Flat Screen 2. I laugh like a maniac because I control the finances. “NO FLAT SCREEN FOR YOU!” I yell in my Soup Nazi voice. He hides under the covers. Maniacal laughing continues….(Don't worry, hair...I won't let that stupid Flat Screen chick get in here before you are drenched in lovely carmel tones...)
Overheard yesterday afternoon…
“Did you just shank me? You just SHANKED ME!” Tween Caveboy yells.
I rush into the family room hoping not to find a re-enactment from some bad prison flick. I find Tween Caveboy holding a pen away from 6 yr old Irish Dancer Girl who is looking mighty angry.
“Did you just shank your brother?” (I ask this while trying not to laugh hysterically at the fact that I am actually using the word “shank” with my kids.)
She glares at both of us. “Well, yeah, I did…” She looks at me like I’m stupid.
“How do you even know what shank means?” I ask obviously very disturbed. She points at Tween Caveboy. It figures. So now begs the question…why would my 6 yr old try to pull prison moves on her big bro?
“What happened?” I say using my “Mean Marge the Prison Guard” voice.
“He beat me at Tic Tac Toe.” she crosses her arms and huffs.
Yeah, remind me never to play that game (or any game that involves things that can be “shank-i-fied”) with her again!
(What? Didn't you know I was really Martha Stewart?)
Catherine informed me today that she will be hosting her own web show on my blog as soon as I purchase a new web cam. She said the Geeksters (that’s what she calls them) better get the laptop fixed and fast because she has to do it. I don’t think this show had any influence on her at all.
I’m sure many of you have already seen this, but my sister shared it with me yesterday. I cried my eyes out....again...I've done a lot of crying this week! I know it's been all over the place for months, but in case you missed it….Seriously, it is completely AMAZING! I’m not “lion”! You may want to grab tons of tissue first! It really made me miss "Born Free!"
You can still enter the giveaway if you haven’t done so! Go here!
Thank you all again for your very kind understanding about my inability to blogstalk and spread my comment love. I am extremely limited and have resorted to computer hijacking until my laptop is repaired. (cross your fingers for a speedy recovery!) I only get a few minutes here and there to get online over at the parent’s house. As mentioned previously, I will be back to annoying all of you very soon! Hugs and smoochies!
(I will be starting Warm Fuzzy Friday next week...hopefully! Keep your fingers crossed!)
Dawn (I know...so boring when it's not in my fancy writing...soon, my friends..soon..)
I told Chilly last night that it was time for me to get my hair done. He just stared at me. I say it once more with feeling. More staring. Then I understand what is going through his pea-size brain. He is trying to figure out how he can get a new mistress, Flat Screen TV 2 to move in here! (in case you missed it, a power surge took out our flat screen, laptop and XB360 on Tuesday.)
After more staring, he finally says “We ask that you bear with us during this difficult transition.” WHAT? He's using his "skip tracer/ banker" talk on me! Then I realize he’s making a desperate attempt to plea for his new mistress, Flat Screen 2. I laugh like a maniac because I control the finances. “NO FLAT SCREEN FOR YOU!” I yell in my Soup Nazi voice. He hides under the covers. Maniacal laughing continues….(Don't worry, hair...I won't let that stupid Flat Screen chick get in here before you are drenched in lovely carmel tones...)
Overheard yesterday afternoon…
“Did you just shank me? You just SHANKED ME!” Tween Caveboy yells.
I rush into the family room hoping not to find a re-enactment from some bad prison flick. I find Tween Caveboy holding a pen away from 6 yr old Irish Dancer Girl who is looking mighty angry.
“Did you just shank your brother?” (I ask this while trying not to laugh hysterically at the fact that I am actually using the word “shank” with my kids.)
She glares at both of us. “Well, yeah, I did…” She looks at me like I’m stupid.
“How do you even know what shank means?” I ask obviously very disturbed. She points at Tween Caveboy. It figures. So now begs the question…why would my 6 yr old try to pull prison moves on her big bro?
“What happened?” I say using my “Mean Marge the Prison Guard” voice.
“He beat me at Tic Tac Toe.” she crosses her arms and huffs.
Yeah, remind me never to play that game (or any game that involves things that can be “shank-i-fied”) with her again!
(What? Didn't you know I was really Martha Stewart?)
Catherine informed me today that she will be hosting her own web show on my blog as soon as I purchase a new web cam. She said the Geeksters (that’s what she calls them) better get the laptop fixed and fast because she has to do it. I don’t think this show had any influence on her at all.
I’m sure many of you have already seen this, but my sister shared it with me yesterday. I cried my eyes out....again...I've done a lot of crying this week! I know it's been all over the place for months, but in case you missed it….Seriously, it is completely AMAZING! I’m not “lion”! You may want to grab tons of tissue first! It really made me miss "Born Free!"
You can still enter the giveaway if you haven’t done so! Go here!
Thank you all again for your very kind understanding about my inability to blogstalk and spread my comment love. I am extremely limited and have resorted to computer hijacking until my laptop is repaired. (cross your fingers for a speedy recovery!) I only get a few minutes here and there to get online over at the parent’s house. As mentioned previously, I will be back to annoying all of you very soon! Hugs and smoochies!
(I will be starting Warm Fuzzy Friday next week...hopefully! Keep your fingers crossed!)
Dawn (I know...so boring when it's not in my fancy writing...soon, my friends..soon..)
Comments
Hilarious!
At least your sense of humor and good writing skills weren't damaged in the Surge of 09. Hang in there ... and Happy Happy Easter.
And I have an awesome giveaway going on at my place...so I hope you'll come by and enter...
I'm still praying to my geek gods for a speedy recovering. Have you started twitching yet? I get there in about 2.1 seconds when something happens to my stuff. I'm going to email you a product that you need to invest in to protect your stuffs. We have like 4 of these bad boys.
I control the finances too, muahaha!
I had no idea what "shank" meant! ;)
I'm still dying at Chilly's mistress. Dont cave in! Your hair is WAY more important! Not to mention... ahhhem... yeah. So maybe. Just maybe. Chilly could use a good shanking?!
I love that lion video. I cried when I watched it the first time, too!
And I am also the finances controller here. The Poor Army Man never gets any sent his way. I finally did crack down and he got his own fancy schmancy Flat Screen TV a few months ago. But if it ever breaks, you'd better believe the old tiny TV is coming out of the garage as a replacement!
Sorry you are having so many computer issues. I can't wait until you are back to full blogging capabilities!
Anyhoo, hope your laptop has a tres speedy recovery. I thought I had lost my cell phone last night and was so totally lost without it! I feel your pain!
please... hair takes precedence over new tv ANY day.
That video made me cry too. :)
Sigh
My hero
So how are you BB?!!
And I'd stay away from your daughter...and your son for that matter. Sleep with one eye open.
Hope your tresses get caramelized soon.
I use my "soup Nazi" voice around here a lot, I love it.
My 5 yr old son actually said the phrase other day "That is so last year". Obviously he is watching his teen brothers cartoons LOL
I love your writing (wish i could on par...). I was in tears half-way through the Shankstory-- and after 12 years in TDCJ!!! Now, if you've enamored THIS hardened bird, you got Moxie, Ma'am!!!
Slainte!
I will admit to needing tissues while watching the video!
Love the soup nazi story. We use that impression a lot around here!