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We Are A Family of Creepy Carnies

Before I begin letting skeletons out of the closet, I would like to say a big thank you to my very dear friend, Pam for passing along this bloggy "Spreader of Love Award"! I am feeling the blog love lately, and I appreciate it very much!


I would like to pass this along to a very special blogilicious friend. She has a special place in my bloggy heart. Shalee at Sometimes It's Good to Be Speechless...this is for you! Shalee was my first follower and that meant the world to me! Please drop by and visit Shalee! She's a SITS Saucy Blog too!

All righty then...since I vowed that Sunday would be a day of rest, I figured I would hang out with my kids and maybe get some reading done. I wandered into tween caveboy's cave-room and found him strumming his guitar with his long skater hair covering his face. "Wazzz Up?" I ask in my very feeble attempt to be "cool". He stops strumming for a second and grunts...(typical), "Huh?" I sit on the floor with him. "Whatcha' playin', dude?" I notice that he is seated in a weird yoga-like position while playing the guitar. Hmm...that's odd..."Metallica" he grunts at me. "Really? Which song?" Catherine waltzes in with a scarf around her head and wearing her black tutu. "It's 'Enter Sandman', Mama" she says cheerfully. Seriously? My 6 yr old listens to Metallica?? It dawns on me that she looks like a gypsy fortune teller. "How do you know that?" I ask in amazement. She stares at me like I have rocks for brains. "Mom, I know everything." Oh yes, she's obviously Madame Fortuna Knows-it-all. How stupid of me not to notice! She giggles and runs off. "Are you really playing that song?" I ask Connor. "Yep" he grunts, flips his skater hair forward and starts strumming loudly. Great, I have a tween caveboy guitar strumming contortionist and Madame Knows-it-all running around my house. Feeling a bit freaked out by my weird kids, I decide to go make some lunch.

I made hot wings. I burned my palm when I took them out of the oven. I began my first aid treatment of running my hand under cold water and using flowery "French" words while hopping up and down. Cat asks for my hand. She stares at my palm and says, "It will be better in a few minutes, Mama." Wow! She reads palms too! Madame Knows-it-all has some impressive talents!

Chilly starts scarfing down his hotwings the very second I put the plate in front of him. He reminds me of one of those sideshow geeks...real geeks...geeks that eat the heads off live chickens. (That's what geek really means..look it up!) He is eating these wings like he hasn't had a meal since, oh I don't know..two hours ago. You'd think he hadn't had a meal in months the way he was ripping into those wings. I'm not worried about him choking though. Chilly is the biggest cheater of death you have ever seen. He has survived a brown recluse bite that gave him a near fatal staph infection. He lived through his rotting ruptured appendix oozing all over his other organs causing them to begin shutting down. He told the Grim Reaper to get lost when he coded at the hospital after his bypass. He's indestructible! Now that I think about it...I am starting to see a bizarre pattern here. No...couldn't be...I shake my head and decide to read for a while.

I head off to grab my book and as I passed by the mirror, I gasped. HORRORS! Could it be? No way! It can't be true! But there it was...very fine facial hair along my jawline. At that moment I knew my worst fears were confirmed. We were a family of creepy carnies. All of the day's events made perfect sense now. The tween caveboy musical contortionist...Madame Fortuna Knows-it-all, fortune teller and palmist....Chilly the Geek & Cheater of Death...and finally me..the Bearded Lady.

I suppose there's a silver lining in this somewhere. We can always go on the road if times get tough. "Step right up! Sideshow freaks for hire! Ready to amaze and astound you! Coming soon to a creepy carnival near you!"
Have a Happy Monday!

p.s. Oh! Today is Cammie's 100th post! She's over at Life in the House of No Sleep and she is shooting for 100 comments for her 100th post! Go give the girl some comment love!

p.s.s. Did you know that this star of HBO's short lived series "Carnivale" is the cartoon voice of a character you all know? Clancy Brown....well known tv and movie character actor, one of the stars of "Shawshank Redemption" as well as "Carnivale"...

...is the voice behind this very famous cartoon character.......


Mr. Eugene Krabs! Spongebob's boss! Owner of the Krusty Krab! I couldn't believe that! (yes, I enjoy filling my life with useless trivia such as this!)

Comments

annie kelleher said…
oooh ive seen more than a few of chin hairs myself the last few months !!!! fortunately i have a lovely person named lisa in my life who's sworn mission is to keep me defuzzed!!! happy monday! :)
blueviolet said…
I'm a circus girl and you're a carnival freak. No wonder we get along!
Cammie said…
Can I get a funnel cake please?
Jamie said…
Yay for your fun and unique family, hehe! Sounds 'normal' to me ;-) Except the 'cheater of death' part from Chilly...very scary!

And CONGRATS on winning my Domino Magnet giveaway...woo hoo! Please send me your address when you get a chance!
Jamie
pam said…
Wow, you are certainly an open book to admit that facial hair here for the whole world to see!! I bow to you. I would never be so brave.
Awe thank you so much for the award! I am sorry I don't comment as often as I should, but I do read your posts all the time girl. :D

Its okay my family belongs in the circus too. :D
Brenda Jean said…
BAHAHAHAHAHAA Next time you go into Caveboys room you need to say "Hey Dawg, what's happening? Have you downloaded any good guitar tabs lately?" Until Cmas I didn't know what guitar tabs were-- now I sort of do--okay, not really. I just know they use them to learn songs.

I love your family-- it's okay if you are carnies. I don't mind. In fact, I want my fortune told!
Motherboard said…
Dude! No way! You have carnies? You seem more normal than most carnies I've seen... I have a mustache, can I join your traveling troupe?

I love Sponge Bob. He's my guilty pleasure. Who knew it was the scary Carnie from Carnival doing his voice? He plays a great bad guy!
blognut said…
I would like to hire your entire family for entertainment purposes. Maybe you guys could work birthday parties?
Tracy said…
I second the funnel cake request!! YUM!!! Aye... now I'm going to be craving that and corndogs. Baby J is not going to be a happy camper when he realizes we wont be getting either!
Erin said…
We love to hate Mr. Krabs around here. Arg-arg-arg-arg.

Fun post!
Kristina P. said…
OH my! I totally did a post about my chin wattle hair that has creeped up and I did a picture with me as the Bearded Lady. I feel your pain.
Ashley said…
Lol, you crack me up!
Kathy said…
You are hilarious! I'll buy tickets to your family-carnie-show, if you'll buy tickets to mine!

p.s. I spent 20 minutes plucking my chin hair last night - arghhhhhhh!!!
kel said…
Creepy Carnies!! too funny!
The Dotterel said…
Congrats on the award. Well done!
Nerdy Jess said…
I will take a funnel cake and a caramel apple please.

Andplusalso, I have carnie hands..They are small, but don't smell like cabbage, or so the husband tells me.
mama's smitten said…
I love the circus and carnivals .No wonder I find you so facinating !
Kristen Andrews said…
entertaining as usual, we are a circus here too
Marie Reed said…
LOL! Nerdy Jess so beat me to the Austin Powers cabbage related comment!
The Blonde Duck said…
I want to walk the tightrope in rhinestones!
Yaya said…
You are too funny! Carnies...hahaha....caveroom...lol!

Love that your daughter knew the name of the Metallica song!
Lori said…
LOL...sounds like you have lots of fun over there!!!
Kirsty said…
LOL..I LOVE the word Carnie!!! I think my family belong in a circus most days!
Debra said…
OMG - I know what you mean! I mentioned the same thing about myself last month in my post titled A Hot 25 Year old Stuck in this Body. Yep, my biggest freak out happened when I found a long black hair on my neck. Ugh! So gross, but so true. Pulled it out and it came back again. Pulled it out the second time and so far so good. No signs of it in months. But does your carnie show have any vacancies? I am very qualified! LOL
Momo Fali said…
You crack me up! And, just to make you feel better I'll tell you that I had to pluck a black hair OUT OF MY NECK last week.
Me said…
I'm really not laughing at you...but really with you. Seriously..though, who do I give my ticket to? I paid my dollar to the nice lady outside the tent!

P.S. Just teasin'. I loved the story though!
LOL! Hilarious! I better think about doing a closer inspection in the mirror just in case... ;) I always wondered who did the voice of Mr. Krabs - but always got distracted when I was going to look it up...thanks for saving me the trouble! LOL! ;)
Susan said…
No way, Mr Krabs???? I wouldn't have guessed him ever (as I had a few in mind for the voice). Don't ya like how I slid right by all that awkward carnie folk talk? lol
Jenners said…
This was toooo funny! I loved it (and I could give the Bearded Lady a run for her money unfortunately). I love Madame Know-It-All, and I guess you won't be getting rid of Chilly anytime soon! Jeez ... waht a lot of stuff to survive!

And thanks for all the little factoids. This was quite an informative post!

And I gave you an award here:
http://findyournextbookhere.blogspot.com/2009/02/kindle-2-and-big-thank-you.html
Debbie said…
It happens to all of us. Some of us just don't have the guts to blog about it though.
Dawn said…
Girl, you are so witty!! I love it! Great post. And, funny!
Jenni Jiggety said…
LOL! Sorry about the chin hair...I can pretty much braid mine...
Lana said…
I have a beard too. Sigh. I'll rip those lil suckers out, check daily, and nothin'. Then I skip a day of chin hair searching to find a foot longer dragging off my face a day later. HOW does this HAPPEN?!?!
BoufMom9 said…
HUGE HUGE fan of Carnivale when it was on and the whole time I was reading your post, I was picturing episodes from that show :) LOL

LOVE your daughter the fortune teller :) Cute post!
Stephenie said…
Thank you for welcoming me to blogland. I'm so excited to start blogging and meeting so many wonderful women. Will visit you again.
Stephenie
TuTu's Bliss said…
See there are WORSE things than being the bearded lady. HUGS!! Jen
Noah's Mommy said…
think ya should take your act on the road??? and congrats on your bloggy award....
Seeker said…
what can i say...you out did yourself with this post...love the "carnie" traveling show idea. you can come visit and do it here. will sell lots of tickets i am sure. could be worth your time. stop plucking so they will pay more....LOL

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