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I Wanna Be A Woman and Have A Husband

My darling six year old shared this lovely tidbit with her father last night...her father, who has already had multiple heart attacks...literally. "I don't even want to know this," he says completely traumatized. Gee, Chilly, why not??? You are watching "The Bachelor" for goodness sakes! Aren't you the romantic one? (No...you're not mistaken...you do hear lots of sarcasm in that question...) What is surprising about this turn of events for you?? The fact that she's 6 and already thinking about her nuptials, or the fact that she wants to be 25 already? At least she didn't say, "I want to be like Barbie and dance around a pole for money!"

"You're not getting married!" he says sternly. "Yes, I am" she says looking him dead in the eyes. "No boy stands a chance with you while I'm around," he laughs in his "I'm gonna meet all your potential boyfriends with a high powered weapon" voice. "I'm getting married when I'm 14", she says firmly. Uh...can anyone else hear the banjo music playing? "Yeah, about that, Cat," I intervene carefully, (because I definitely do NOT want another visit from Miss Hi-Yah so soon,) "That's kinda young. I'm thinking 36 is good!" "I say 50!" bellows Daddy with a hint of panic. Connor hears the fear rising in Daddy's voice and comes running to his rescue. (ok, he probably really just wants to inflict verbal torture on Miss Kitty, but I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt..) "Your sister wants to be a woman and have a husband." I tell him trying not to giggle. "You're dumb", our tween caveman grunts at her. "Nuh uh...Bobby is going to be my husband." she smiles while narrowing her eyes at him. ( Bobby is her invisible friend...they spend hours "talking" on Cat's "cell" phone.) "Bobby's dumb," grunts tween caveman. "You're dumb," smirks Catherine. "Any boy who shows up to date you will wish he was dumb," says my husband. A scuffle breaks out between the tween caveman and the little "woman." I figure Big Gun can flash his Daddy badge and restore law and order between these two hooligans. I take this as my cue to make hasty exit so I can hide this....


(please ignore the wrinkles...it was just delivered from the kingdom of Andalasia from Giselle...)
I am not a fan of banjo music at a wedding, and this would definitely send Daddy back to the ER with another heart attack! Sorry Bobby! Time and place, my invisible friend...time and place!

p.s. I realize that what I'm about to write will make most of you say, "Big Whoop..Who Gives A Crud?" But it's such a rare event that it deserves a special mention...IT SNOWED IN TUCSON LAST NIGHT! People actually had to scrape ice and snow from their windshields! There is actually accumulation of the powdery white stuff! Is it possible that there could be a Snuggie in my future? Thanks, Mother Nature! (oh, yeah, Mother Nature? Can you make it go away by 2:00? I have to drive to Tucson for dance today...Not a fan of black ice or dumb "I can't drive in a quarter inch of snow" drivers...I remember how fun it is to drive in it from the "old days" living in Ohio...It would really be swell if you could just warm it back up some...Air Kiss!)

Comments

Cammie said…
looooove the post about Cat. So stinking funny. Im sure I will be there someday....
kel said…
so cute! Roslyn swears that she never wants to get married and definitly never have kids!
Tracy said…
Hahaha! I've got a 12 year old who looks 19, I can feel your pain acutely! Here's a kicker though, I tried not to interfere too terribly much, and lately she's been telling me, "I don't have time for a boyfriend. Boys just get in the way!"
We LOVE that!
Me said…
This is just too funny! Your kids are Adorable!!

P.S. Congrats on the snow! I hope it melts in time for your drive. I too hate driving in it!

p.s.s. I like the new layout! Its cute!
Andrea said…
She's just too cute! She sounds a lot like my little Haylee bug! Haylee had to be a bride for Halloween she was so obsessed with getting married for awhile!
Tracy said…
so stinkin funny!!! i heart your miss kitty and caveman! i can't wait to have baby j and hear his little stories he comes up with!!!

aye! sorry for the snow. it was FREEZING here in the so cal last night. woke up with ice on the roofs and windows. i'm in a parka as i type this. no joke. hahahaaaa
LORI said…
I'LL NEVER FORGET THE DAY WHEN MY SON (NOW 12) ASKED ME WHAT ROOM IN OUR HOUSE HE AND HIS WIFE WOULD LIVE IN...CUE THE PSYCHO MUSIC.! I THINK IT'S EVERY DADDY'S FANTASY TO MEET THE WOULD-BE BOYFRIEND AT THE DOOR WITH A SHOT GUN--DON'T THEY REMEMBER THEIR YOUTH?! MAYBE THEY DO, THUS THE REASON FOR A SHOT GUN!
I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU GUYS GOT ACTUAL SNOW! WE JUST GOT LOADS AND LOADS OF RAIN...WHICH WOULD'VE BEEN NICE MINUS THE MIGRANE IT BROUGHT WITH IT. I'M BACK TO THE LAND OF THE LIVING (SORT OF) AND READY TO BLOG AGAIN!
LORI said…
THANKS FOR THE SECRET OF THE SCRATCH--YOU ROCK! I THOUGHT IT WAS JUST KEY THAT I DIDN'T HAVE...TOLD YOU, CYBER-CHALLENGED. AM SERIOUSLY CONSIDERING SCRAPBOOKING TODAY, I REALLY WANT TO GET SOMETHING DONE BEFORE MY NEXT LONG-TERM SUB JOB STARTS, AND THE SINUS THINGY IS A BIT BETTER TODAY! I'VE BEEN COMPLETELY OUT OF IT FOR ABOUT A WEEK...BLAH.
MyLinda said…
Too cute! Those are moments to cherish!
Kristina P. said…
Of COURSE there is a Snuggie in your future!~

Love the new blog look! I used to have that header before the one I currently do now. I like how you have the white in the middle, and the blue on the outside. I might have to do something similar.
Debbie said…
Hey, new look over here, isn't it? It looks great.
What I love most about this post is how your hubby and your kids were about the same level of rational!
The Smiths said…
We'll need to make sure boy3 stays out of AZ, then. He's been ready for a wife the entire 8 years of his life. He's recently become "unattached" from a 3 year relationship. He's enjoying the single life, flirting with women of ALL ages.
pam said…
I like your new layout. I see Cat is 6 going on 16. Bangos aren't so bad, I'll get up and dance!!

Safe travels. I am glad you like your snow!!
Kristin said…
Like the new look. Tagged you on my blog.
Claire said…
How cute!! Love the picture of her in her "wedding" dress. Laura wants to get married to Daddy and was pretty annoyed when I told her that he was already taken by me.

She then demanded to know why I didn't invite her to my wedding....I told her that Nana (my Mom) would not have liked that!!! :)
The Blonde Duck said…
It's never snowed here! I'm jealous!

Love your new look!
mama's smitten said…
Okay seriously ! I don't watch tv anymore. I just tune in to bee and rose for entertainment. Fun post. Love the new blog look!!
The Dotterel said…
Snow in Tucson. Whatever happened to global warming? (Or was it for Cat's white wedding?)
Aunt OOOOOO said…
Uhhhhh....Snow in Tucson and its suppose to be 60 here in Upstate NY tomorrow after a week of single digits, ice and 3 ft of snow! WTF? Love the new look! Fabulous!
blueviolet said…
Hey, you threw me for a loop with the background change! It's cute!

I think it's all awfully sweet because it really means she wants to be like you! :)
Brenda Jean said…
bAHAHAHAHAHaha I needed this post and the laughs. It's been a cruddy day:) My husband keeps joking that our daughter is doing the princess frilly thing NOW, and then she's going to turn 16 and wear all black become goth. Just tell your husband that-- he'll feel better. BAHAHAHAHA

Congrats on your snow. Ours is MELTING!
How adorable! My husband often says "I'm glad we didn't have girls - I'd never let my daughter out of the house" ;)

snow, huh? Cool - should have taken pictures
Jenni Jiggety said…
Enjoy your snow! And you better start saving up for that wedding! LOL!
Kristen Andrews said…
she is just too cute. Our snow is melting but we will get more!
bernthis said…
one day I walked into my kids pre school and heard her and her 4 year old girlfriends arguing about who was going to marry their classmate "Rex" they were FOUR-
MindyLew said…
Daddys never want to hear or discuss this topic with their little girls - Not even when they are older.LOL - I do not like to drive in the snow either - Hope it all melts by the time you have to leave. :)
Marie Reed said…
My Noah's favorite word is dumb too! I mean how many times can he say it daily?

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